Here are the fine people who will be putting their deranged thoughts on this site. It’s all their fault! I’ve asked each of them to state their name, what they do, and their alcoholic beverage of choice.

Matt E.

I’m Matt! I’m twenty-something from a fishing village called Toronto, Ontario. I’ve got a bachelor’s degree in business, which makes it odd that I don’t have any money!

I do all the neat designy stuff for the site. If something looks messed up, it’s my fault! I enjoy drinking whisky. If you want to get a hold of me just send your morse-coded telegram to mail [at] maplerag dot com, where I’ll probably read it!

Jenn B.

I’m Jenn! I’m twenty-something and from somewhere in Canada, what’s it matter to you, creep? I enjoy writing, movies, and just being a sarcastic bitch and a sloppy drunk. I don’t really look as masculine as the way Matt drew me in that icon, but I kinda like my new androgynous look.

I’ll write articles sometimes, and I enjoy drinking rum, because I’M A PIRATE YARR.

MAPLE BOT

I AM MAPLE BOT. I WILL PERFORM ADMINISTRATION AND WILL REPORT ON IMPORTANT ROBOT NEWS.

MY BEVERAGE OF CHOICE IS 01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01101101 01101111 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 00100111 01110011 00100000 01101101 01101111 01110100 01101111 01110010 00100000 01101111 01101001 01101100