I was going to write a SERIOUS BUDGET RESPONSE, like everyone else’s doing, but that just wouldn’t suit our… style. Instead, here’s this.
On Monday, two older men – their hair graying, their eyes full of doe-eyed innocence – stepped back in front of the cameras with their finest suits freshly dry-cleaned, ready to return to [...]

A new trend is sweeping the nation: contemporary music with increasingly sexist themes is being heard from coast to coast, and little is being done about it. A hit song called “O Canada”, written by Quebecois rapper Calixa Lavallee in 1880, is spreading its message of sexist hatred across the nation. This song’s vulgar message [...]

WELCOME BACK, POLITICS! We missed you! Our Olympic break was fun, though, we got to post all sorts of silly things as the OFFICIAL CANADIAN™ POLITICS BLOG OF THE VANCOUVER™ 2010™ OLYMPICS™, writing about sexy curlers and acid flashbacks and Nickelback, but now we have to put our Serious Hat back on to make Serious [...]

PART FIVE: I believe in the power of old white guys talking for a long time
And as John Ferguson takes to the mic, honestly, all I have to say: “WELL, YOU ASKED FOR MORE FUCKING FRENCH, YOU GOT IT!” It seems cruel to rip this guy more since everyone on the continent [...]

Before I begin my discussion of what on Earth just happened in Vancouver that 3 billion innocent people were allegedly exposed to, I’d first like to explain the term “troll”. In an online context, a troll is someone who gains pleasure from the displeasure of others. They often put painstaking hours towards creating long, elaborate [...]

Well, we already did this stupid, horrible thing for the Scotties, it would be unpatriotic if we didn’t do it for Canada’s Greatest Olympics(tm), right? [Editor's note: "He did", not "we did", as always I have nothing to do with this - Your Female Editor]
As always, attractiveness will be judged using the terminology of skip’s [...]

Curling is a drinking-based sport played by chubby old men in sleepy prairie hamlets consisting of sweeping a broom against an ice surface while everyone screams dirty-sounding verbs at each other. It’s simultaneously the best and most stupid pastime that we as Canadians have. Every year, the best female curlers in the country (and by [...]

First, read this CP piece with a straight face. Alright, alright, get all the chuckles out. There we go.
To recap, Fisheries Minister Gail Shea got pied by the notorious terrorist group Al-Pieda, a group with possible ties to the Talibanana-cream. Honestly, I could just sit here all day and think of puns involving pie and [...]